cette pièce me fixe *

I’ve never been accused of knowing too much.

Teachers would wonder if I knew anything. 

Too much knowledge leads to overactivity;
Better to calm the mind.
The more you consider, the greater the loss;
Better to unify the mind.
Water dripping ceaselessly
Will fill the four seas. 
Specks of dust not wiped away
Will become the five mountains.

—Wang Ming (6th c.)

The more cluttered this room gets the less chance I have to escape a fire or corral a cogent thought. Not that either of those things carries any attraction.

Seas and mountains are depths and heights unto themselves.

I’ve no idea what I am unto myself.

This room stares at me. *

小川のほとり、湿った葉の下 *

 When I lost

My mind

I looked 

In kitchen

Food scraps

Empty cat cans

Pile of unread

Mail and magazines

It was not there

It had been recycled

Dumped in bin

At transfer station 

Waiting to be

Taken elsewhere

Living without

A mind is ok

No one looks at you

You become nameless

If you happen outside

Squirrels jump off feeder

Birds fly off waiting for

New seed, grass stretches

Sky hangs cloud laundry

Port-a-potty passes on truck

But no mind

Not anywhere to be found

Only walking sticks

Leaning by barn door

Talking to each other of

once-were’s and used-to-be’s

Their rubber tips

Not nearly worn through

Where some mind on a mountain

Might have dropped a thought

Some passing hiker’s boot nudged

It under damp leaves by rivulet *

een kleurrijke plek*

Black

Brown

Red

White 

Yellow —

Yes yes

Yes yes

Yes —

 America 

A colourful

Place*

φροντίδα για την υγεία*

Caring for health.*

 “I think that being scared is a sign of being sane.” (Line from series taking place in Spain spoken to detective with paranoid schizophrenia in his family.)

Hantavirus isn’t a worry for another pandemic, Malignant narcissism and besotted egomania is more the fear of the remaining sane population. The greed and criminal insanity of the head of the Executive Branch has a viral effect on each person under his malevolent shadow. We are a nation under threat of infected imprinting spiralling down the social/cultural genomes of a weakened biological/spiritual population.

Being angry is a false-positive.

Being scared might be the route to sanity.

Just like, long ago, the fear of the lord was the beginning of wisdom.

Now, fear of our insane chief executive might trigger a latent immune system to produce antibodies and creative cells to replicate a clear and healthy body-politic going forward.

We need a sane, clean, and healthy new patient-zero from whom to begin the immunisation and recovery of an informed, justice-bitten, and resolved populace committed to not being sick.

Are you the one?

so sleep silent angel

 Buddha sits on box in window

No temple, no altar, no rinzi or soto

No academic degree or political pac

No office seeking or board of directors

He sits there, rain behind him

No scandals threatening to topple him

Oh, the freedom of it — being nobody

Going nowhere, free from history 

Isolated from opinion and scrutiny 

The little bronze Buddha leaning back

Facsimile of someone long gone

Something of itself merely there —

If you want to practice Buddhism then

Practice Buddhism, a good enough choice

There are worse things to do — I’ll not mention

Them — these days I have chosen solitude

A reclusive consciousness behind closed doors

A stretch of road going nowhere, cars gliding by

the role of one’s lifetime

 Jim Carrey on “Deep Rest.” —

The impermeable impermanence 

of who we think we are

that’s a load off

 I used to think

I’d want to go somewhere

Now

I don’t think

Finding myself

Nowhere 

xingling

Every apology is an admission of defeat. Some people never apologize. It doesn’t mean they are not defeated; it means they are dead to their circumstances and oblivious to whatever reality wherein they stand. These are dangerous people. They believe they are never wrong. That belief proves they are dead inside, and their outside is a grave danger to anyone near. 

Since my will broke down

I now have a clearer view

of the leafing roadside trees

(wfh, with apologies to Mizuta Masahide)

In Hemingway’s words: 

“The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry.”

(― Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms) 

From Mirriam-Webster:

cf “will”: 

: the act, process, or experience of willing : VOLITION

: mental powers manifested as wishing, choosing, desiring, or intending

b: a disposition to act according to principles or ends

c: the collective desire of a group, the will of the people

5: the power of control over one's own actions or emotions, a man of iron will

6a: something desired, especially  : a choice or determination of one having authority or power

b (1) [from the phrase our will is which introduces it]  : the part of a summons expressing a royal command

(2)archaic : REQUEST, COMMAND

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/will 

From Yuan Mei:

Blossoms bring the Spring.
Spring doesn’t take them with it
When it goes.
Clouds flow upon the stream.
The stream cannot hold them.
I’d ask why that is,
But no one’s here, but
This tall tree,
Beneath which I will idle
Pondering
The place,
The Spring,
The clouds.

Yuan Mei (1716-1798)

Yuan Mei proposed xingling as necessary for poetry.

The literary theory of xingling (“soul”) is an early category in the history of Chinese literature, which was first proposed by the famed Buddhist literati Fan Tai, Xie Lingyun, Yan Yanzhi, He Shangzhi and other figures during the Southern Dynasties, Liu and Song periods, and broadly applied by figures such as Liu Xie, Zhong Rong and Yu Xin to esthetic theory and poetry criticism. There are chiefly two aspects to the origins of the literary theory of xingling in Buddhist philosophy: The first is the idea of foxing (“Buddhatā, Buddha-nature”) within teachings on nirvana in Mahāyāna Buddhism, and the second is the idea of shishen (“vijñāna, consciousness”) in Hīnayāna Buddhism. After being introduced into China, the theories of “Buddha-nature” and “consciousness” were ingeniously combined with the concepts of guishen (“supernatural beings”) and linghun (“spirit”) in the native Chinese tradition. “Buddha-nature,” “consciousness,” and shenling (“divinity”) were organically integrated, forming the basic content of the Buddhist theory of xingling, which referred not only to a constant and immutable, supremely powerful, and mystical force intrinsically possessed by all living creatures (sentient beings), but also to a foundational energy that filled the cosmos and obliterated differences. This provided a profound and substantial philosophical basis for the literary theory of xingling by Liu Xie, Zhong Rong, Yu Xin and other figures, imbuing xingling with the status and power of a universal center with supreme sublimity and matchless energy. 

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00094633.2023.2180210

Upon further consideration, that which is core within us is care. Those with damaged souls (core) do not actualize care. They suffer this lack as do those near them or those under their supposed care.

We have a Republican administration suffering an absent core of care. So too Legislature. So too Supreme Court. So too Republican majorities and governance in Red states.

They are killing us.

Like serial murderers not yet apprehended they elude accountability and avoid justice.

We are besieged and distraught.

Still, in the Northeast, blossoms bring the Spring.

A clear view of what is flowering helps heal what is broken. 

neumz, from laudes

8. Aspérges me hyssópo, et mundábor: 

    8. O purify me, then I shall be clean;

lavábis me, et super nivem dealbábor.

    O wash me, I shall be whiter than snow.

9. Audítui meo dabis gáudium et lætítiam: 

    9. Make me hear rejoicing and gladness,

et exsultábunt ossa humiliáta.

    that the bones you have crushed may revive.

10. Avérte fáciem tuam a peccátis meis: 

    10. From my sins turn away your face

et omnes iniquitátes meas dele.

    and blot out all my guilt.

11. Cor mundum crea in me, Deus: 

    11. A pure heart create for me, O God,

et spíritum rectum ínnova in viscéribus meis.

    put a steadfast spirit within me.

12. Ne projícias me a fácie tua: 

    12. Do not cast me away from your presence,

et spíritum sanctum tuum ne áuferas a me.

    nor deprive me of your holy spirit.

13. Redde mihi lætítiam salutáris tui: 

    13. Give me again the joy of your help;

et spíritu principáli confírma me.

    with a spirit of fervor sustain me.

14. Docébo iníquos vias tuas: 

    14. that I may teach transgressors your ways

et ímpii ad te converténtur.

    and sinners may return to you.

15. Líbera me de sanguínibus, Deus, Deus salútis meæ: 

    15. O rescue me, God, my helper,

et exsultábit lingua mea justítiam tuam.

    and my tongue shall ring out your goodness.

16. Dómine, lábia mea apéries: 

    16. O Lord, open my lips

et os meum annuntiábit laudem tuam.

    and my mouth shall declare your praise.

17. Quóniam si voluísses sacrifícium, dedíssem útique: 

    17. For in sacrifice you take no delight,

holocáustis non delectáberis.

    burnt offering from me, you would refuse.

18. Sacrifícium Deo spíritus contribulátus: 

    18. My sacrifice, a contrite spirit,

cor contrítum et humiliátum, Deus, non despícies.

    a humbled, contrite heart you will not spurn.

https://app.neumz.com/listen/laudes-alleluia-alleluia-amplius-7a-laud-fer-4-cum-cithara-72c4f0b4-cfe7-4209-a70f-d996647de502/13-05-2026

electorate

 Grow old

Watch the foolish govern

You never know

Something good

Could

Emerge

αυταπάρνηση*

 I’ve forgotten 

How to socialize

Nothing personal

Just abnegation*

Annotating an

Obscure disappearance 

umwelt *

 Chasing down a quote misrepresented in a book about four women philosophers, I find the correct and deeper statement of the reference:

"We often look to someone like Hildegard or to other great people throughout the ages as if what they have is not ours to have; we admire them, honor them, study them. We want to make use of them, and we allow them to consummate our inner light for us. We allow them to be the still point of our turning world. We feel incapable, yet the world wants to infuse us and to be infused by us. At that point no one can help us, not angels, not men, not Hildegard, not Jung, not Rilke. We cannot live securely in a world which is not our own, in a world which is interpreted for us by others. An interpreted world is not a home. Part of the terror is to take back our own listening, to put our ears to our own inner voices, to see our own light, which is our birthright, and comes to us in silence."

(-- vol. 21 Fall 1991 Gnosis, quote is from the last paragraph of Elaine Bellezza's article entitled "Hildegard of Bingen, Warrior of Light”.) https://www.facebook.com/groups/hildegardsociety/posts/10154634287567953/

It will only get more difficult to find accurate and less artificial representations of something said or meme-ic posting on social media or even front pages of propagandistic media.

We live in a world of comical world leaders posting absurd pericopes about fabricated news meant to sway markets and swell private wealth and who-gives-a-damn about the rubes and marks populating our playground?

Hildegard might not have said it, not as written here, but her influence is detectible in those final words: 

We cannot live securely in a world which is not our own, in a world which is interpreted for us by others. An interpreted world is not a home. Part of the terror is to take back our own listening, to put our ears to our own inner voices, to see our own light, which is our birthright, and comes to us in silence.” [ibid]

Perhaps the demand on us is to accept that, in a now fragmented and desiccated world of deception and mendacity, it becomes our intelligent inquiry to resurrect or refashion a world with the resonance and resemblance of something genuine and authentic to counter the falsity and gaslighting of those who would dissemble what is true into a misalignment that is advantageous only to them and their sycophants.

In prison yesterday, I feel like a ninth grader being schooled in the geometric tumbling of AI and financial manipulation of world markets and military strategies for the benefit of the few and topmost people.

I am not intelligent enough either to comprehend what is going on nor, certainly, to have any impact on the correction of the misconnections and severances amputating authentic service and assistance to those needing help domestically and abroad.

What we thought once was Christian has become casuistry on the part of snide and triumphalist false folks appropriating the symbols, metaphors, and scriptural references once reserved for authentic holiness and redeeming service.

We need to find again and reclaim our own inner voices, our own light, and the invigorating silence that inspires restored Being and true Humanity to our communities/surroundings.*