Saturday, August 27, 2022

no worse, but different

Each has disappeared

Looking this way and that none

Are seen — love dissolved

nothing left to give

 bee at jule flower

quickly assesses stay go

cohorts following

out of darkness leading to dim light

center origin

where nothing becomes something

an absolute gift

followed by subject object

evaluation judgment

norma jeane's sorrowful death

"It's hard to know where to start

if you don't start with the truth." 

                        (-Marilyn Monroe, d. 4aug1962)

 the surprise isn't 

that loveless things occur, but

sometimes kindness does

ya na (you are not) alone

 I am 



There is 



(Don’t you)


Friday, August 26, 2022

metaphorically unmistaken

 Who do you serve, who

receives your ministration —

(everyone) — amen

santoka’s view

 When in the mountains,

I will watch the mountains,

On rainy days

I will listen to the rain,

Spring, summer, fall, winter,

Morning is good,

Evening is good.

— Santōka Taneda 種田 山頭火
English translation: James Abrams

kvetching the contours of notoreity

 Waking with two words

grizzling, greyling — shear complaint

freshwater fishes

 habitat pollution, both

psyche and surface unclear

Thursday, August 25, 2022

one bell, consecration, si nous regardons

 ask me, I prefer

propel to excel -- to move through

not surpass, but thrive

...   ...   ... 

excel (v.)

c. 1400, transitive, "to surpass, be superior to;" early 15c., intransitive, "be remarkable for superiority, surpass others," from Latin excellere "to rise, surpass, be superior, be eminent," from ex "out from" (see ex-) + -cellere "rise high, tower," related to celsus "high, lofty, great," from PIE root *kel- (2) "to be prominent; hill."

propel (v.)

mid-15c., propellen, "to drive away, expel," from Latin propellere "push forward, drive forward, drive forth; move, impel," from pro "forward" (see pro-) + pellere "to push, drive" (from PIE root *pel- (5) "to thrust, strike, drive"). Meaning "to drive onward, cause to move forward" is from 1650s.

Online Etymological Dictionary)

and you don’t know me

 Night office bell rings

What earthly good might it sound[s]—

Comes now to our ears

cough from down hall

 Cucumbers in bin

by road at house across from 

Snow Bowl ‘for free’ sign

Wednesday, August 24, 2022


This is what I recall.

 No traces left

             of the house where I was born:


                (—Sandoka Taneda) 

Hearing no further sound. 




as simple as you can

round bread from Whole Foods

peanut butter and chivers

umm, umm, with coffee

mind one's own, (busyness)

The eternal feminine and the wise old man. Jung looked into these two. The reality of the psyche. An apriori fact of nature, an objective phenomenon.

Each night a visit. Every dream an orientation. An ordinary psychosis disenchanting the solid belief two plus two is four.

Mandalas, found all over the world, primordial images of wholeness or totality, the Jungian investigation.  

This Wednesday, in mid-coast Maine, between mountains, my psyche drifts amnesiac between two worlds, (or is it three?) completely uncertain as to who has lived my life up to now.

Wandering through mind with Jung, Campbell, Joyce, Santoka, Pirsig, Heidegger, Dogen, and Lowell.

Not their minds.

But mind.

One's hermitage.

One's cell.

One's anchorage.

Bowing to all residue of personage who've aggregated and aggravagated the sluice passage I and every other have taken enroute here and elsewhere. 

Fellow pilgrims wandering. 

An aesthetic collating the interdisciplinary obvious. All these years later. Still wondering where any of us belong.

My brothers in prison. We meet, sit, and converse. We consider what there is to learn, how learning is teaching itself. The one revolutionary emancipation, becoming free, even in the most restrictive spaces, even between cranial confines, between sternum spine enclosure.

Our elder in Carmel encourages that I attend the shakuhachi player's 80th birthday celebration. I tell her only if I drive the 359 miles to pick her up and bring her back the 329 miles to the gathering and then take the 718 mile roundtrip returning her to her anchorite homestead.

She demurs. 

I will have to write a haiku. I will not have been not at the gathering, only not as one might appear.

I suspect, if there is a continuity of life beyond this material/physical existence, I will have to devise a series of mythopoetic contrivances to obfuscate the seemingness of anti-phenomenological semblance while honoring the integrity of affective fondness even in absentia.

"Law is born from despair of human nature."  -- Jose Ortega y Gasset

A non-sequitur doesn't mean it doesn't follow.  

Despair is as good as repair.

One could argue, less expensive.

beginning raps on wooden invitatory

 Reading Joseph Campbell on James Joyce while walking snow bowl between Ragged mountain Bald mountain Melvin hills and Hosmer pond.

The sound of words encircling archetypal foundations of thought from which all symbols form and fall and feel their way into thin air which fills our fleeting awareness with facts and falderal and fanciful fennels of  recollection.

Such as the dream I wake from tonight. The cast of characters and unopened package of pipe tobacco in jacket pocket along with honey soft cough drops.

“They lived and laughed and loved and left.”

—James Joyce, Finnegan’s Wake

One by one.

Eaves sending drops to sun porch roof.

The sound of it.

Like Basho’s unaccountable surface broken.

Tuesday, August 23, 2022

forgiving yourself

Not easy, being fooled.
"Treat them nice in a world that just spit on you" (--Manti T'eo, in documentary, Untold: The Girlfriend Who Didn't Exist" Netflix)

Coming through the other end, the difficult bow at end, this inexplicable play.

tagata lelei, faafetai 


good man, thank you

Monday, August 22, 2022

why not be it

Perspicacious, see

Through and through a bullet clean

And clear not killing

Sunday, August 21, 2022

think/unthink intimate presence

 Heidegger was tricking us.

He said we are still not thinking. 

And we conclude that he was saying we must begin to think.

He let us mull that, and we concluded an erroneous conclusion.

Here's what I think: To think is to unthink.

To unthink is to be still. (He said:

"We are still not thinking" -- and we missed it.)

To unthink is to be

still, silent, present.

To think is to disappear into somewhere undiscoverable.

If you embrace zen, you hold nothing

and that nothing is (paradoxically) intimate presence.

Intimate presence has no outside no inside --

Only the energy* moving through the physical/spiritual universe

enroute through here/elsewhere.

Now, what if we think/unthink that?

...   ...   ...      

Definition of energy

en· er· gy |  \ ˈe-nər-jē  \

plural energies

1a : dynamic quality  narrative energy

b : the capacity of acting or being active  intellectual energyc : a usually positive spiritual force  the energy flowing through all people

2 : vigorous exertion of power : effort  investing time and energy

3 : a fundamental entity of nature that is transferred between parts of a system in the production of physical change within the system and usually regarded as the capacity for doing work

4 : usable power (such as heat or electricity)  also  : the resources for producing such power